Love Respectfully

One of the major problems encountered in marriage is when men objectify their wives as a tool to satisfy their needs.

This quickly descends into arguments and distance when women lose interest in what is meant to be one of life’s most pleasurable experiences. It creates a vicious cycle because as a woman loses interest, a man pushes even harder for his own needs, which then drives a woman even further away from him.

The Torah prohibits men from "coming close" to their wives when they are objectifying them like the other forbidden relationships. This includes the ultimate prohibited objectification against any relationship with an animal, which is mentioned adjacent to the words of this prohibition to come close.

Only by providing love and care and making the relationship about her as a person and a wife will the vicious cycle be broken.

"Each man must not draw close to the she-air (wife) of his flesh to uncover nakedness…. Do not lie with an animal." (Leviticus 18:7 &20)

Leviticus 21:2 with the relative (she-air) closest to him. 

*Rashi: she-air always means wife